Update for myself mainly

It has been nearly 4 years since I have posted on this. Partly because I completely forgot I had this blog. So I guess I can provide an update, despite the fact that I am sure nobody is reading this.

Since the last time I have written on this, I have graduated from college with my Associate's degree in Criminal Justice and have both the basic and advanced Youth Services certificates. I received an award from the college for graduating with a 4.0 GPA, although my end GPA ended up being 3.97 or about that thanks to a B+ in my English class my last semester. I am currently trying to figure out what I want to continue studying and where. I have been working at McDonald's for the past two years. Despite the fact that I hate the work, I have actually come to like most of the people that I work with. I went on a road trip in 2010 that corresponded with my 20th birthday and let me see Honor Society multiple times and hang out with friends. I now watch my niece on Mondays and Fridays, although that will be ending in the fall because she will be starting kindergarten. She is five years old and it seems like time has flied. Luckily she still seems to love me. I know that every time she says it and when she doesn't want me to leave the house after her father gets home from work.

There isn't really much more to add. I have discovered the joys of having a DVR. I have also experienced the heartbreak of shows I love being cancelled after one season (Chicago Code and Golden Boy, I will miss you). I have discovered the wonderful shows that are known as Teen Wolf and The Glades and continue to love watching Supernatural. I also fell in love with two books: The Perks of Being a Wallflower and Thirteen Reasons Why. Both books are absolutely amazing and I was even tempted to write a review for the last one because of how moved I was. I didn't, but perhaps I will someday after I read it again, since I am sure that I will someday. In terms of writing, I haven't written anything in ages and I miss it. However, I haven't had the motivation to write and I absolutely hate forcing myself to write because I feel that the results don't measure up to my standards. I really hope that someday I get back into writing, but who knows.

I think that is all I want to say for now. Perhaps I will remember this blog now and start using it. However, I somewhat find that doubtful, although sometimes surprising things happen. We shall see what the future will hold. Now back to The Glades and onto Teen Wolf soon.

~Crystal

Pointless...really.

I have absolutely no idea what to write. Just trying out something a friend told me to do to get inspired to write. I haven't written on this thing in forever. Heck I highly doubt anybody actually reads this thing but whatever. Since I've written here last, I've got my GED and my permit. Been practicing driving on Thursdays with my brother-in-law.
Another thing was my two week vacation out to Connecticut. The first week was good. The second week, the concerts were good but the drama sucked. Don't feel like going back to that though. It's in the past.
Speaking of concerts, I get to see Honor Society on November 1st. I love those guys. They make great music, are so funny and soooo nice, and know how to put on one heck of a show. I had so much fun at their Full Moon Crazy show that I went to in Boston on my vacation, so I can't wait to see them again.
The only possible down side is that I have to go with my mother. But as long as she doesn't do anything to piss me off, it should be alright. And as well as she lets me do the meet and greet after the show. If not, the car ride back may not be all that fun.
Been babysitting my niece, Taylor, on Thursdays and Fridays. Meaning that is where I will be for the next two days. I have limited computer access there which means if I'm in the mood to write tomorrow, I'm going to be pissed. Yes I know there is pen and paper and I'll have that with me but the things I write, all the stuff before where I'm at, in on my laptop and a website. Meaning if I want to refer to that past material, I'll need a computer.
Alright I think this is pointless enough. I mean it pretty much skips everywhere. Whatever.

1 day...that's it?!

So tomorrow is March 23rd.
To most people that day has no significance whatsoever.
To me however it means one thing...
my birthday.
Now most people would be excited for such a thing...and I'll admit, most years I am.
However I don't want to turn 19.
I have nothing against the age...I just don't want to be it.
Why?
Well it means that I am almost out of my teens...and getting older.
I don't know...I just would kind of like to stay in my teens for a little bit longer...even though they haven't been my best years.
Yes I know it sounds stupid...but I can't help how I feel.
I'm pretty sure it's just fears though.
What fears exactly? Well I'm not entirely sure but I have an idea.
Although a bright side to turning 19...only two more years until I can legally drink.
Being able to obtain alcohol and legally enjoy it...well that could make hanging out with my mom more enjoyable at times.
Which sounds horrible, I know, but it's true.
We don't have the best relationship...and actually most days we don't talk...mainly because I don't live with her or call her but still.
There are things that happened in the past...things said just last year...and it's taking me a long time to forgive her for those things that happened when I was in middle school.
The things she did aren't as bad as what other parents do...like oh abusing a kid.
But they were emotionally scarring.
And this blog post is getting much more serious than I planned...so therefore I'm going to stop now.

la-de-da

Well I haven't written on this thing in a while.
Not surprising for me though.
I don't do much so it's not like I have anything interesting to report.
Let's see...the Jonas Brothers world tour information is supposed to come out today.
I'm really hoping that it does get posted today...
and I'm really hoping that they come to Michigan.
If they do, maybe I'll be able to see them this time around.
Um...my niece is coming over tonight just like every Wednesday.
Which means I should actually go to bed soon so I have gotten some sleep.
Anything else...oh my birthday is coming up.
Actually it will be my birthday in 12 days.
You did your math correctly if you figured out that my birthday is the 23rd.
I'll be 19...which is weird cause it doesn't feel like I'm almost out of my teens.
But I am.
Nothing else to report really...and I really don't feel like trying to come up with anything interesting to say.
Maybe I'll actually go to bed soon...then again probably not.
Until next time.

<3
Crystal

can't believe

not much happening here but that's nothing new.
went over to my sister's on Friday to watch Taylor while they went shopping. went pretty well.
Saturday was still there. stayed there until about 5 o'clock because Taylor has a birthday party. she got plenty of gifts; a stuffed leopard and monkey plus a Michigan outfit from my dad, brother and me. she even had her own cake to dig into. plenty of grabbing some and moving her hands so the cake and frosting would go on the floor with some making it's way onto the wall.
at the beginning of the party, she seemed to want to hang out with me for a while. i don't get why the kid likes me so much but i love that she does.
Tomorrow is her actual birthday and i so can't believe that she is turning one. it doesn't seem like it's been that long. i mean yes she is walking some and talking (mostly saying 'kitty' and 'bah') but it still doesn't seem like it's been a year since she's been born.
tomorrow is also when the soundtrack to the Jonas 3D movie comes out....i want to get that not going to lie.
a month from today actually is my birthday. i'll be turning 19. i'm almost out of the teens which is weird. doesn't feel like i should be out of those yet.
and i think that's enough of pointless rambling for one post.

no idea

okay so it seems that my niece seems to love me.
i mean tonight there were times where my dad would hold out his hands to her to ask if she wanted to come to him...
and instead she would reach out to me.
i love that she loves me and everything but i'm pretty sure it hurts my dad just a little bit.
i know that she loves him too though.
and i know that he knows it as well.
speaking of my niece...
i get to babysit her again on Friday...
and i'll be staying the night over there once again.
this time i will be sure to actually sleep though seeing as my niece Taylor's birthday party is Saturday.
i so can't believe that she is turning one.
i know understand what parents mean when they say their kids are growing up so fast.
i know she's not my child but it seems like just a few weeks ago that she was brought home from the hospital and all that.
i love that she's walking and saying a few words.
mostly "kitty" but still...
it's so cute.
and i can't wait until she starts saying more.
although i know i may get annoyed by it at times...
but there's a bright side to that...
i get to send her back to her parents at the end of the day.
haha not nice but true.
i just hope that as she grows up she wants to hang out with me and things...
hope she thinks of me as a cool aunt.
it would kinda suck if she didn't.
anyway there is a Crystal ramble for the day.

down this road again

it seems like i'm going back to the mood i was in last weekend.
the mood that Ashley has called my emo mood...
cause apparently i gave it to her...
and it seems like i'm getting it back.
i don't want it back though.
i hated having it the first time around.
the random feelings of just wanting to break down into tears.
the tears forming ready to fall
and then the few times where they did actually fall.
it just all sucked.
maybe i'll emerge myself into day dreams or something to try and get myself out of it.
i just hope that if i do that it actually works.